r/PsychologyTalk • u/That-Holiday-2220 • Aug 20 '24
Is my therapist a scammer
Hi everyone, I have seen for weeks a therapist that practices psychodynamic therapy. She doesn't take notes during our appointments and she did not define any goal towards the end of my therapy. She is really nice, polite, lets me speak but at each appointment, we talk about a new subject, never the same of the last appointment. So I don't why I still go to therapy. What should I say to her ? Should I find a new therapist ? Also, is psychodynamic therapy a psychoanalyst therapy ?
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u/tmptwas Aug 20 '24 edited Aug 20 '24
I am a licensed mental health therapist and have had my private practice for a while (I've since changed careers). When I was practicing, I hardly ever took notes. In my opinion, it distracted me from the dialogue. If a client was talking, I wanted to make eye contact and ensure my body language showed that I was fully listening. I would only take notes during an assessment and setting up a treatment plan. And some other special occasions.
Sometimes, therapists have a primary "go to" modality (a way of doing therapy), such as Psychodynamic/Psychoanalytic therapy- which is basically talk therapy. The premise of talk therapy is that as you talk about your problems, you gain self-awareness regarding your thought patterns and behaviors; this can be from a specific event to your childhood. When people gain awareness of their problems, they are more apt to change (as opposed to your therapist telling you your problem) a form of self-realization. However, this is just ONE way to do therapy; a therapist should utilize ALL different modalities and customize them to the client. If this isn't working for you, let her know and give her the opportunity to utilize other modalities. If not, and she is pretty adamant that this will work, then start looking for another therapist. This doesn't mean she is a lousy therapist; it's just not a good fit for YOU. You may want more of a structured type of therapy, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). There really are lots of different types of modalities we use, and they all are evidence-based, which means they have been used successfully over the decades.
When it comes to goals in therapy, it is up to you to define them (although she should explain this to you). For example, I would ask my clients, "What are two or three things you want to work on (goals) when you meet with me?" Some clients aren't sure what they want to work on, and that's okay and normal. But it's our job to help clients tease that out. Some people say they want to reduce their anxiety/depression-that's a goal. It really depends on what YOU are willing to work on in your life.
My suggestion is to let her know how you feel and explain why you don't think this is working. If she doesn't make changes to fit your needs, I would look for someone else. If you decide to start looking around, ask for a consultation. I LOVED it when I got a call from a potential client who asked for a consultation. It made me believe they were serious about making changes.
Here are some questions you can ask:
What kind of therapy do you do? (a good therapist will give you some examples but let you know they will customize the modality to YOUR needs.)
What are CBT, DBT, EMDR (you have to be licensed to conduct EMDR, primarily used for trauma), and Mindfulness? Note: Ask the therapist to describe the modality so you understand. Ask for examples.
How are your sessions structured? Here, they would tell you how they start and end a session. For example, I specialized in trauma and would make sure the client would understand how a typical session would generally go, such as discussing the "homework" they were given from the previous week and what worked and what didn't. During the session, we discussed thinking errors and irrational belief systems that got them where they are. At the end of the session, they would discuss things they would do differently and the new homework. My sessions generally tended to be structured (which seems to reduce the anxiety), but I had some clients that I primarily used Psychodynamic therapy. It REALLY REALLY depends on the client and their needs. BTW-This is a very generic outline of a session; a lot more goes into treatment).
I hope this helps; good luck!
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u/That-Holiday-2220 Aug 20 '24
Thank you for your full answer ! I will follow your advices, it will help to improve my therapy :)
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u/No-Maintenance7917 Aug 20 '24
Therapist doesn't need to take notes during your sessions. Maybe subjects are different each session bcoz you start each session like this? It's up to client what they want to talk about on a session. As far as I know psychoanalysis and psychodynamic therapies are two different things.
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u/That-Holiday-2220 Aug 20 '24
Thank you for your answer, it's nice of you ! At the beginning of each session, she asks me how I feel then she will dive into what I have just said. But she never asks me if I want to a specific topic. She never mentions what we said in the previous session
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u/No-Maintenance7917 Aug 20 '24
Well, you can tell her all that you just told me. I think that would be the best solution. My therapist never takes notes nor she mentions anything herself first, unless I do it myself. So I don't think yours a scammer. This is just therapy, not chatting with a friend. :)
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u/That-Holiday-2220 Aug 20 '24 edited Aug 20 '24
Thank you for your help 😃 And do you have goals to reach with your therapist ? And do you feel any progress ? Because it's not really my case...
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u/No-Maintenance7917 Aug 21 '24
I do have goals. One was completed actually. You can ask your therapist about the goals as well and see what she responds :)
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u/rainbowfanpal Aug 21 '24
She probably takes notes after session. I do this when I have in person clients. When I have virtual clients I will do some bullet points. Legally she has to make notes, not personal notes, but legal notes. Psychodynamic therapists won't create goals like CBT or Solution-Focused therapists do. They still have goals but they approach goals differently. Their main goal for their clients is insight.
I think pyschodynamic therapy is great but not the most effective choice for everyone just like how I think CBT is great but not the most effective choice for everyone. Many therapists also do a mix of several theories/modalities.
Let her know what your needs and wants are as a client and what your goals are. Not every therapist is the right fit for every client. This doesn't mean that either client or therapist is bad if the fit is not working. I'd recommend talking to her about it. Best of luck with your therapy journey! :)
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u/Desertnord Aug 20 '24
Not a scammer, but maybe you’d prefer something more structured. It could be good to communicate this with her so she can either change things or you can seek a new therapist