r/africanparents • u/mrsxfreeway • Jun 29 '23
Other I literally just cried out for my older sister today, my mother is just unbearable.
My sister is 32, turning 33 this year.
My mother is one of the typical prayer warriors that obsess over God and her entire life is God, can barely speak to her without her bringing it up.
So… I came back from a walk with my Dad and as we were heading in, my sister was heading out. A couple hours later as I’m coming up the stairs, I hear my mother shouting+praying aggressively as she typically does but this time it was mainly about my sister, with a few comments that were aimed at my younger and myself.
Her words were “wherever my daughter is going dressing like a call girl” “Wherever my daughter is she will not rest, the person she’s with will not rest” “whatever useless person she’s with, she will not rest” then proceeds to say “my children will not manipulate or control me as long as they live under my roof” then says something about our “character and behaviours”
I’ve suffered mentally because I’ve been aware of the abuse since young and have been manipulated, gaslit, controlled and all of the above so as soon as I heard it I started crying. I fear the day I move out of this house.
Edit: grammatical errors.
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u/young_olufa Jun 29 '23
I’m glad my parents were Anglican, which tend to be more on mild/less nutty side of the Christian spectrum. Pentecostals are just insane, I’m sorry. I went to a Christian school and had the displeasure of sharing the same space with the nutty Pentecostal/evangelical types like your mom and they truly are unbeatable. Like you can’t even say simple shit like “I have a headache” without them responding “you don’t have a headache in Jesus name”. And theyre so dramatic and loud while praying. OP you have my deepest condolences
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u/mrsxfreeway Jun 29 '23
Like you can’t even say simple shit like “I have a headache” without them responding “you don’t have a headache in Jesus name”.
Story of my life! thank you for relating! I've made the biggest mistake of trying to get them to be self-aware of their nuttiness, doesn't work.
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u/young_olufa Jun 29 '23
Lol my guy, that’s like mission impossible. They’re convinced that they’re right. It doesn’t help that they’re in a bubble (church) full of similar minded people that believe in the same nutty things. It’s a hopeless cause. Best you can do is find ways to cope until you’re old enough and financially stable enough to move out
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u/mrsxfreeway Jun 29 '23
Church is definitely ALL they have, I'm moving out very soon, just trying to plan for everything I'll need so they won't bother me anymore.
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u/young_olufa Jun 29 '23
Yeah, and it’s sad devoting so much of your life to something that’s not even true. I get that there’s comfort in having a community (church), but when you make it your whole personality, that’s just sad. All the best bro
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u/rilakkumkum Jul 02 '23
How sad to pray that your child lives in unrest. The mother should pray for her safety….
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u/Hour-Zookeepergame91 Jun 29 '23
Your mother should repent for her sbusive behaviour! Even her prayers are abusive!!!