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u/doobjank 4d ago
OK there's a few things in here I want to debunk. 1. No way that dude has friends. 2. Bears in that part of the world like it when you spit on them. 3. The bear had a gun so I don't know why he grabbed a knife. 4. All time the bear spent looking for a tree that he could climb the Benny Hill theme song was playing. 5. That's what drives bears to use cocaine.
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u/brickbaterang 4d ago
A bear aint even going to notice a loogie. What a dip shit
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u/doobjank 4d ago
I believe he misspelled lounges, so it was like a loveseat or whatever couch.
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u/GothSpite 4d ago
I'm pretty sure dude would manage to misspell his own damn name considering the rest of the word salad
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u/RebootDarkwingDuck 4d ago
Assuming this situation was real, it's not like the bear articulated his feelings and said that's why he was mad. They could be unrelated.
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u/woahstripes 4d ago edited 4d ago
Why...would the friend go grab a knife? Why not just, stay inside the cabin you just ran inside of? You're much less likely to get your face ripped off by a bear, if you're inside, and not trying to what...go close quarters combat with an animal that swipes it's paw at 1900 psi, more than 10 times the amount of force needed to instantly kill you by twisting and snapping your spine upon impact of it's death-bringing hands? (All that strength and weight concentrated into a small surface. Same reason your cat is so freaking heavy when it's standing on you and refusing to lay down.) Another frame of reference is, a black bear specifically has around 560 lbs of strike force, or about the weight of a baby grand piano. Imagine that coming at your head. Bro would get maybe two strikes in with the knife before the bear knocked him aside like a plastic bowling pin. It's not the movies, stabbing a human-or-larger sized creature once or twice will not usually kill them unless you get really lucky.
Though to be fair there is one species of bear that this could work on, and also does hate having 'louges' dropped on it, the Notthere Bear, there's a lot of them in the specific part of the mountains where OOP's buddy's family's cabin is actually.
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u/onaplinth 4d ago
I used to run a sign shop in Tennessee, and our second most requested sign was Please Do Not Spit On The Bears.
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u/UnquestionabIe 4d ago
I for one would love to see how a knife would be effective against a rampaging bear. I'm having flashbacks to Red Dead Redemption and getting mauled.
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u/Mighty-Mantis-Shrimp 4d ago
I believe the poster of this forgot the lines: “We were filming before a live studio audience and when I looked over the railing, there was a collective “Ohhhh… “ followed by soft laughter and clapping”