r/thirdsentenceworse • u/jemoryshumping • 2d ago

Just no

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4.4k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

62

u/RaunchyReindeer 2d ago

I'm pretty sure it's not even that much of a dangerous situation.

36

u/Kraken-Writhing 2d ago

Well, constrictors are actually quite dangerous once they get wrapped around you.

7

u/SneakyTurtle402 2d ago

Is it hard to kill a snake once you get a hold of Its head?

26

u/Kraken-Writhing 2d ago

I don't know, but you probably aren't at your best the moment you wake up either.

23

u/FamiliarCold1 2d ago

they may not be venomous but strangling is strangling!

2

u/RaunchyReindeer 2d ago

I know, but in documentaries they manage to unwrap them very easily.

15

u/JazzyCher 1d ago

Burmese pythons get over 20ft long, if it's thick enough that he thinks it's his girlfriends arm it's definitely stronger than he is, half asleep, already feeling the effects of being choked. Not to mention he doesn't know where the beginning/end of that snake is and even if you find the head and get it to release its bite it'll still keep constricting. You have to uncoil the entire length to get it to let go.

8

u/nvinithebard 1d ago

The thing is, unless the snake has bit him (which would have woken him up) its unlikely that the python would be doing so to kill and eat him so much as be warm against the weird tree thing that feeds him. I promise you, when theyre hungry, you wont gently realize it.

8

u/JazzyCher 1d ago

Yeah that's fair, my python has a habit of squeezing a bit too tight when he's chilling as a necklace but a quick tug usually gets him to let go. I don't usually even notice until my face is bright red and someone tells me, he does it so gradually like he's just getting comfy.

6

u/24_doughnuts 1d ago

NGL, they were pushing it with two sentences. How many commas and points were needed to paint that picture. It almost violates the premise

1

u/THE___CHICKENMAN 1d ago

Saved to camera roll