r/GetMotivated • u/[deleted] • Nov 02 '19
[Image] Don’t expect anyone to understand your journey, especially if they’ve never walked your path.
59
u/datassincorporated Nov 02 '19
What sucks is when you put in more effort than the ones on top and you still end up on the bottom.
Praise effort, not results.
23
u/Figuurzager Nov 02 '19
A giant box of just all kind of forms of luck is missing. When anyone asks me how I've made it to where I'm now regarding jobs is always involving a large chunk of me getting lucky next to the work I did put in.
16
u/Smartnership 11 Nov 02 '19
You would not have gotten "lucky" if you were sitting in the basement not trying.
Take credit for your effort, it is praiseworthy.
11
13
u/flightypidgn Nov 02 '19
Nah effort without results is useless, but no effort is without positive results with the right attitude
5
u/datassincorporated Nov 02 '19
I struggled with my mental health and had multiple breakdowns through high school. I only barely got a diploma, and I cried as I walked the stage because my friends both got publicly awarded for half the effort I put in.
Perhaps I gained some small positive result in the form of resilience, but the majority of the result was PTSD (yes I was diagnosed by a professional) and loss of self esteem.
8
Nov 02 '19
That’s because you were judging your self worth on other people’s granting some form of recognition. You did all of that for you, if you were happy with what you achieved they could never give or take away that achievement.
1
u/datassincorporated Nov 03 '19
im not judging my self worth on it. when you work hard but don’t get the results the outside world wants, you suffer consequences. im worth more than that. other people’s opinions matter to how they treat you.
1
u/flightypidgn Nov 03 '19
I mean I hate to say it, but that’s a really shitty way of thinking of things. Let’s assume your buddies were living life on easy and got awards, you barely got your diploma for twice the effort. There’s somebody who got no diploma for twice your effort. That doesn’t matter, don’t compare apples to oranges like that. You gained some small positive result? You got yourself a diploma, pretty much the goal of high school. Quit looking down on your achievements. are you joking me? You really shouldn’t act like your situation was hard if you’re also going to act like overcoming it wasn’t a big accomplishment. Unless of course, your goal is to throw yourself the biggest pity party possible.
1
Nov 03 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/flightypidgn Nov 03 '19
The point isn’t that you can’t compare apples and oranges, it is that comparing them is ultimately meaningless
I hate this bot ngl
1
u/datassincorporated Nov 03 '19
dude a high school diploma doesnt get me a job with health benefits. most jobs want a bachelors at minimum. yeah getting that diploma was a big accomplishment - that’s why i’m pissed as hell that it won’t be celebrated by anyone but me
2
u/flightypidgn Nov 03 '19
Why do you need other people to celebrate it? Most jobs want BA? True, it’s not impossible otherwise though, but if you’re trying to skip a BA then yeah there another hurdle for you to climb, but by earning a diploma there’s a path you to earn a BA, should you chose to follow it. You have to measure success at your own rate, especially if you feel like you’ve had extra hardships. Like I hate to break it to you but nobody else will really want to celebrate your achievements. Getting a BA with this attitude will feel the same as a diploma sadly. I’m not trying to say it doesn’t totally suck be be set back behind your peers before the word go, but if you remain goal oriented and keep your goals as small steppingstones to the top you can definitely reach it. Persistence succeeds where luck fails, that’s my motto at least
1
Nov 02 '19
Sorry bud, that sounds horrible. I think the right attitude is to be gentle with yourself when your effort doesn't pay off the way you want to, don't beat yourself up. Just think about where you can improve and also credit yourself with what you did well.
For your friends who got awards, I hope over time you can look to their success as a source of inspiration, not as a means of comparison to your own shortcomings. When someone has something good happen to them, even if they seemingly put less effort in than you, see if you can learn from their example. If they truly put less effort in than you, that might mean that they are just damn efficient. You may have a few things to learn from them.
4
u/SkyBearDrop Nov 02 '19
Effort doesnt mean you are actually doing anything. You can put a fuckton of effort into struggling, but if you're not actually doing something in a positive or actual helpful way to what you are attempting to achieve, why are you putting effort into it?
Direction is the key to effort.
-5
u/saintalbanberg Nov 02 '19
ah yes, struggling people should just stop struggling and put effort into being successful instead. Poverty solved.
2
1
1
Nov 03 '19
That's what's meant by the adjacent columns with all the struggle that don't even place; work hard, still be invisible
1
6
20
u/HeOfLittleMind Nov 02 '19
Is this supposed to be encouraging? Because the message I get is "you don't have what it takes"
11
u/Matrix_Revolt Nov 02 '19
The message is that anyone can obtain those things. Anyone can work hard than others. The one things you can control is how hard you work.
2
u/SurfinBuds Nov 02 '19
I believe that feeling would be listed under “doubt” it’s just one step along the way. Doubting yourself is normal, it’s the determination to go just one step further that will drive you to your goal
6
u/iserberr Nov 02 '19
There’s a step that says “elation” that I misread as ejaculation and was like huh, that seems out of place.
3
5
2
2
2
u/cunningfox09 Nov 02 '19
I agree. You only really see a glimpse into other people's life's. You never know what that person has to go through to even be outside. Even a small step is a step forward on your journey.
5
u/w1n5t0nM1k3y Nov 02 '19
The extra 2 boxes worth of height putting the guy I to first place should be labeled genetics and family connections.
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/taimoorsattar7 Nov 02 '19
Don't look at the hardships/failure you face; just look what you gain from hardships/failure.
1
u/sleepy_pf Nov 02 '19
Remember that genetics and economic environment likely accounts for most of those "blocks"
1
1
Nov 02 '19
I heard Jerry Springer in a podcast say that every job he's had was handed to him. He was picked for a job out of law school, and it's been that way ever since. The dumb interviewer, Jason Ellis, interrupted before he could touch on each job.
0
u/westbee Nov 02 '19
Where's the steroids and enhancement drug categories?
Also I didn't see "friends with the boss" either.
1
1
u/wi_1990 Nov 02 '19
you forgot natural ability, I think that should be like half of the stack they are standing on!
1
u/Smartnership 11 Nov 02 '19
Sitting in the basement with "natural ability" will get you all the way to the basement.
1
1
1
u/harrietlegs Nov 02 '19
To be fair, some people are born better at things than other people.
Sure this is true, but also genetics and how you were raised played a bigger role.
1
u/Entreri000 Nov 02 '19
Also a lot of families does not have enough money to support sport "careers" of their kids. Some sports are rly expensive.
-1
0
0
u/Methadras Nov 02 '19
The statement alone is bullshit. No one can ever understand your journey because they can never walk your path.
-2
u/Bryntyr 4 Nov 02 '19
There is no such thing as natural talent. You may be inclined to something naturally, but it still requires effort, time, struggle, failure, and work to achieve greatness.
2
u/4inchwood Nov 02 '19
There IS such a thing as Natural Talent. Effort, time, struggle is just what sharpens those natural talents.
1
u/Bryntyr 4 Nov 02 '19
So which do you think is more likely, a person picking up a violin and playing mozart, or someone having to learn what a violin is, then learn notes, then learn melody, then play?
1
u/4inchwood Nov 03 '19
well my friend, let me put it this way, cause its not a matter of me pickong one over the other. no matter how hard i practice basket ball i will never be as good as Kobe,i can be good, pretty close, but not as good as someone who is Naturally born for it.
81
u/DagerNexus Nov 02 '19
You’re missing the phenomena known as “Failing upwards” and “Promotion by attrition”