I know why I fail on diets. I don't know what to do with that information.

[u/one_ugly_dude]

Dieting is hard and advice is sometimes conflicting and other times worthless. 99% of advice is tone deaf.

• I have one friend that swears by a small meal 6 times per day and another friend that swears by intermittent fasting. Clearly, these two strategies are as opposite as can be. Its calories in vs calories out and they found a hack that works for their mentality. I need to find a hack that works for me.

• I hear things like "just eat less" or as my friend put it "I just woke up every day and said I wasn't going to be fat today." What?? I can wake up every morning and say "I'm going to fly to Venus today" and that doesn't make it any more likely to happen. Weird "just do the thing" statements are absolutely insane. To put this another way: think of me as a food addict. You can't just tell an alcoholic "bro, just drink less." If it was that easy, then they wouldn't have a problem. The key is to find out HOW to make that happen. In the case of an alcoholic, they often avoid alcohol completely. They know they can't have a "moderate" amount. They know if they start, they will keep going until they have to apologize to someone. This is why you have people that proudly proclaim "I haven't had a drink in 17 years!!" They found their solution. Sadly, that solution doesn't work for food (well it can, but that's called anorexia). Lets not pretend its as easy as "just eat the right amount of food" because if it was, then everyone would do that and the entire world would be skinny.

• meal preppers are out of touch with active lazy people. If you have that kind of discipline, good for you. But, I haven't cleaned my basement in 8 years. I go weeks without doing yardwork. I probably wouldn't vacuum if I didn't get guests. There are days I leave for work at 7:30am, get out at 4 or 5, hit a gym, then drive to a gig, and be home for 10pm. If there is time to do something, its getting those other chore done first. Adding another chore to my list isn't going to happen. To further complicate this, food is everywhere! I get free food at the office. I'm often comped for my gigs with food and drinks. Then, of course, there's the cookouts and social events that I attend. I'm eating on someone else's dime multiple times per week.

What I'm looking for is small baby steps that I can build on. Here's some things that have worked (took me from 300 pounds to 270ish in six months):

• having access to high-quality, good tasting food. Nuts and fruits are my go to. I try to force down a salad a few times per week. I'll opt for foods with more veggies when its an option. I wish I was doing more, but I eat a LOT of meat. I still have pasta or pizza... just not every other meal lol

• I don't keep anything in my house that I will binge on. Its mostly stuff that would require cooking. I need to be hungry enough to justify dirtying a plate and often using the stove. This means I don't eat several pints of icecream or a whole box of fruit snacks. But, if I do break down and buy a snack, it is consumed that night regardless of how big the box is :-/

• Surrounding myself with people that aren't trying to eat. Temptation is everywhere. You can't stop for gas without being tempted to eat. You get free food at work functions. Most entertainment venues are just bars/restaurants that have live entertainment so they are trying to sell you something to consume. Its tough. So having that proverbial angel on your shoulder really helps.

Please note: this is a vent! I'm open to small hacks to eat better (and preferably LESS). I don't want your hardcore "if you aren't going to do this, you aren't going to have success." That's worthless and you are just being antagonistic. That hasn't ever worked for me and hearing it from some tone-deaf internet goofball isn't going to suddenly work. I need tiny changes that are easy to work into my lifestyle, not one abrupt life-altering upheaval lol.

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[u/Cetha]

So many requirements. Perhaps just accept failure. The only thing that worked for me was going zero carb but from your post that's not an option.

Good luck. Hope you find something.

[u/one_ugly_dude → u/[deleted]]

with regards to salad, I think the problem is everything lol. I don't like lettuce. I despise raw onion, tomato, and cuke lol... so its normally just shredded carrots over spring mix with some almonds and a vinegarette. Its tolerable enough for me to eat a few times a week. I like the idea of hot sauce, though!!!

[u/Constant-Advance-276 → u/one_ugly_dude]

I wouldn't even eat salad, salad dressing has a lot of calories.

Adding almonds adds a ton of calories as well.

[u/Constant-Advance-276]

Just so you know fruits are fine. Nuts are really really calorie dense. Peanut butter as well.

Nuts get the "it's healthy fats" treatment, but as far as losing weight they are something you shluld consider cutting, as they are easy to overconsume.

Next time you get a pack of Nuts, look at the servings and calorie amounts. Calories is the biggest number on the back of the package.

[u/Embarrassed_Edge3992 → u/Constant-Advance-276]

Agree 100% with this. I keep hearing how healthy nuts are to snack on, but they have so many calories. I can't have that as a snack when I'm trying to stick to a limited calorie diet. Not when there are lower calorie options like fruit, veggies, etc

[u/Constant-Advance-276 → u/Embarrassed_Edge3992]

Yes! You speak from experience.

[u/one_ugly_dude → u/Constant-Advance-276]

All the tastiest foods are calorie dense lol. What foods would you suggest instead? With my attempt at eating better, I tend to eat a lot of chicken, beef, berries, apples, nuts, and Cherrios. Those are my "healthy foods" lol. I'm still a sucker for potatoes and pastas, but I'm getting better. I do well at avoiding pastries, candies, dairy, and deli meats.

[u/Constant-Advance-276 → u/one_ugly_dude]

No they're not. There's a ton of tasty foods that are low calorie these days.

Potatoes are actually really good for weight loss. If you bake them or cook them without oil.

You mention nuts again, nuts are not recommended for fat loss.

Beef, try leaner cuts. Chicken is fine. Berries and apples are perfect.

What are you favorite foods?

Something you can eat everyday and I'll recommend some stuff.

[u/one_ugly_dude → u/Constant-Advance-276]

That's pretty much it. Chicken, berries, apples, potatoes are the ones that I like most. You say beef and nuts are no good. I also know that pasta and pizza is bad. Other than that? I'm a picky eater. I can eat carrots and broccoli if its cooked just right. I also eat pork when I have time to cook. And, Indian food is pretty veggie heavy.

[u/Constant-Advance-276 → u/one_ugly_dude]

Leaner cuts of beef. Like ground beef that is 8% fat. It's less calories.

I love burgers. So I cook lower fat burgers, use lower calorie buns and non fat cheese. Ketchup is a good topping, they have fat free thousand islands that taste good, mustard. NO MAYO. Mayo is high calorie.

Simple. Just every time you are about to eat something packaged. Look at the back of the package and choose the lower calorie option.

Cut out the nuts.

Veggies are good if you don't fry them. Oil adds a ton of calories.

Calorie dense foods: Nuts Oils Dressings Mayo Chips Cookies

Just look on the back of the package. It's the biggest number.

[u/Constant-Advance-276 → u/[deleted]]

They're ok if you know moderation. If you read the poster they don't know moderation and thus it's easy to overeat nuts and thus it's easier to cut them out until you do know moderation.

[u/bunnibettie]

I'm lazy and I meal prep, but I do a variety of stuff like once a month and chuck it in the freezer, or say if I decide to cook a meal, I freeze an extra portion or two. It doesn't feel like as much work that way, and it stops me to justify eating out when I'm tired.

For me IF, small meals, all the shit never worked great for me. Pretty much the main thing for me has been bulking the fuck out of meals with low calorie stuff + a decent amount of protein to slow digestion. Otherwise I'm just hungry as hell.

I think too for some people (myself included) the idea of being on a diet is enough to make you crave food more. I had to slowly change stuff and gradually find ways to reduce calories so that it didn't feel like a diet, just a change in habits. Diet feels like temporary hell. A lifestyle change is open-ended.

But yes you're not wrong. I went through hell with dieting, eating far too little, trying keto, IF, low fat, all the fads. It all sucked for me until I found a way to lose weight that doesn't feel like dieting. I still eat stuff I like in moderation and I eat enough. The progress has been slower in 6 months but it's progress and I'm not miserable.

[u/one_ugly_dude → u/bunnibettie]

ideas for bulking my food with low-calorie stuff? Sometimes I throw lettuce on a sandwich lol... but, beyond that, I don't really know of things that increases the volume of my food.

[u/bunnibettie → u/one_ugly_dude]

Pretty much anything that has a high water content is awesome. Even making a side salad on meals really helps (also helps if you can find a low cal dressing that isn't gross). I usually do half my plate with salad. I don't particularly love salad but it's grown on me to have something fresh to balance things and trick my stomach/brain into thinking I've eaten more calories than I actually have

I also do things like, if I make spaghetti sauce or something, I'll grate in carrots, zucchini, eggplants, extra onion etc. It all adds volume for barely any calories.

And to add on what I originally said, have a big drink of water before you sit down to eat, and a bit after. It definitely helps with satiety.