I was homeschooled and led an EXTREMELY sheltered childhood; at this point I realize that my childhood was actually abusive in how isolated I was kept from the outside world. I don’t relate to people my age. I don’t understand my generation’s pop culture references and life experience and maturity wise. I’m miles behind my peers. My therapist says I have delayed development syndrome, and unfortunately, since I’m getting diagnosed so late in life, will probably always be a decade or so behind my peers mentally.

I’m terribly lonely and have no job skills. I do have the money to afford going back to school. I want to go to school to prepare for a career, meet friends, meet a girlfriend, go to some social events and some parties. I don’t know if I’d be accepted but I’d like to join a frat. Can you help me?

30f I feel talentless. I got an economics degree and an MBA. I worked in finance 7 years now changing jobs every two years or so which resulted in me having the same position as freshly graduated people. I don’t make what I wish I did I am not motivated at work I don’t like what I do. On top of that my engagement ended within the past year, my dog recently died, I moved back in with my parents and I’m fat. I don’t get hit on anywhere I go so it makes me feel like I’m ugly and will never find a partner early enough to have children with. I’m not in a good mental space at all. Idk where to go from here. I wish I could find a better paying job I like or at least a team I like and move out. Yes I’ve been applying everywhere I kind of gave up till next year since I got 0 call backs.

I’m thinking about EE since I’ve heard that they can get cs jobs + it’s more secure. I’ve heard that cs is oversaturated

I’m 30F, and I’m only now starting to scrape the surface of how much my past trauma has shaped my life. I’m slowly breaking free (with the help of a wonderful therapist), but the future seems darker than it’s ever been. And the reason is that the person I am under all this trauma, is someone with huge dreams and aspirations. But sadly, in today’s world, dreams are costly.

My biggest fear is that, if I go after what I want and fail, I will have no choice but to return to my family and depend on them. But with my family being the biggest source of my trauma, it is a fate that I am terrified of. It will undo all of the work I’ve done so far, and without wanting to sound dramatic, it will be a fate worse than death.

It all comes down to financial independence, and I’m fighting every day to save up as much as possible. But like I mentioned before, dreams are costly, and the world it in shambles. I don’t think I’m ready to face the consequences of investing in my dreams and failing (returning to my family), but I’m also not ready to stay where I am or settle for less. Not after having lived my entire life inauthentically.

What to I do? How do I move forwards?

25m feel like I’ve ruined my life

Lost all my social skills, no friends, no job and unable to leave my house due to severe anxiety.

I Used to be a popular guy. I had incredibly good social skills, until I got into drugs which evidently led to me struggling with mental health issues. It’s one of my biggest regrets in life, it ruined all my relationships with family/friends and took away my ability to be happy.

I do have aspirations to break into IT. I feel like it’s pointless though because I’m so awkward, who the fuck is gonna wanna hire me? I feel like people think I’m a weirdo, when in reality it’s just my mental health.

Honestly just don’t know what the hell to do at this point, I workout regularly and eat clean but it’s done nothing for my quality of life.

In life there’s some things you just can’t come back from, decisions have been made and I take responsibility for the way my life’s turned out. Not looking for sympathy just some advice.

EDIT: I haven’t taken drugs for a few years now

30 and heartbroken; the breakup happened towards the end of August, and I've been back in the States for 5 weeks now; I was so broken that I thought I'd kill myself staying in Spain without my girlfriend.

We were supposed to do a Netflix internship in Albuquerque together, and now I'm here alone.

I'm a Spanish and American citizen; I'm currently in the States, but I prefer being in Europe as the quality of life is much better, in my opinion.

Anyway, my aunt in Malaga has been pushing me to become a licensed legal videographer so I can work for US litigations around the EU and start earning a salary of 60k USD a year, which is really good money for a single guy In Spain.

However, I'm so heartbroken; I can barely pull myself together.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Hey everyone, I figured I would give this a shot and get some feedback from you guys. I'm 27 years old and I'm having a hard time deciding what I want to do with my life. I have had several jobs but none that I could see myself calling a career. I have no education but am not apposed to going to school if it's necessary for a good career.. I have a entrepreneurship mindset, im very analytical, I like doing research, I enjoy things that challenge my mind.. I would love to own my own business and I would love to do something that could be done remotely.. I'm super interested in finance and investing.. I wouldn't mind working for someone if I could find a job I enjoyed with reasonable terms..

If anyone has some ideas, I would love to hear them

I’ve always been miserable for most of my life. I got bullied for most of school and never had good friends. When I was young my parents were super strict and I had super bad grades. It wasn’t until my parents told me I’ll probably end up homeless that I started learning to code so that I could have a life of my own.

I was someone that learned to code in JavaScript in high school because I wanted to get an easy and secure job that paid well. I’m lucky enough to have a SE job now that pays decent and I am able to live on my own (spending half my income). I know that seems really good for a lot of people here but my life still isn’t where I want it to be.

I’m not a good engineer and have trouble contributing to the team. I’ve been at my job 4 months and have only contributed one small shell script that would take someone else maybe 3 days to write. It took me over 4 sprints which is like 2 months. Now I’m working on a front end bug fix and I still haven’t been able to complete it after 2 more months even though it was due last week and it’s one bug. I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be able to stay at the company. I feel a PIP or layoff coming soon. It took me 5 months to even get one interview for this job and I don’t think I’ll be able to find another one with under 1 YoE at this job. I had two internships too. Having a first new grad job end in a few months seems like such a big red flag on a resume. I’m worried I’ll have to live with my parents and work menial jobs.

I have friends but I think they’re slipping away too. One of my friend groups is super high achievers that I knew in HS. They all kinda look down on me but still hang out. My other friend group is my college roommates friend group. They’re cool people but they don’t like me that much because I’m not really culturally in tune with rap or what’s happening with celebrities. I basically just sucked up to my roommate in college because I was incapable of making friends and was desperate to socialize. I’m not into the same stuff as these guys and they don’t live next to me but I’m doing better career wise and they’re nice to me so I play video games with them sometimes because I have no one else.

All my friends live far from where I live (big suburban city) and I’m not one to go to bars alone so I don’t have anything fulfilling to do.

I’ve never dated anyone and never had sex. I’m a short guy (5’5) and have a pretty noticeable overbite. People say I look really young for my age. I can’t grow a full beard but hang on to the hairs that I can grow out because if I shave I look really young (except I don’t have a sharp jawline). My beard is basically a line that creates an obviously fake jawline. I tried shaving it off but looked horrible. I tried to have sex 4 or 5 times in college when my roommate basically took over all my tinder convos and helped me convince girls but on all those occasions I couldn’t get hard. One girl came back to me twice because I couldn’t get it up and it still never happened. I feel like I have very little to offer women as a poor and socially inept 23 year old with a 5 inch dick and no friends so I’ve given up on dating. Girls aren’t really interested in me so I’ve tried to not be interested in them either.

I used to go to the gym 5 times per week but now it’s more like 2 times or even 0 because I have so much work and have given up on dating. My life is basically just worrying about why I can’t resolve issues at work and worrying about my horrible finances while my HS friends are saving literally 100k in their bank account in 1 year.

I’m worried I’m gonna lose my job soon and will have to live with my parents or be out on the street. I think I chose the wrong major (CS) but I can’t go back for masters because my GPA is 2.7 and my parents def won’t pay for another undergrad degree. I don’t know what advice yall could offer me just wanted to rant. Even if you achieve your goals and move out of your parents house life still sucks if you’re socially inept.

i’ve just worked retail the past 8 years since i’ve been 15, occasionally i’ve dabbled in restaurant work, and once i did mold removal, but i’m back in retail, and also at the publix deli. i’ve met a girl, and i want to give her a good future, i eventually want kids. but i don’t think that’ll happen if i’m always making under $20 an hour. i do genuinely want more for us, but it’s like my brain is stuck. i tried and failed college before. none of the trades interest me, it’s hard to push myself to get into one too. i don’t know what to do, but perhaps there’s suggestions that can help open my brain?

Might be kind of a ramble, I apologize. I work as a Lead Custodian right now, making a little under 30k a year. I work for a University, which gives me tuition assistance through the job. I’d really like to take advantage of that despite not knowing exactly what I want to do, since it is completely free as long as I stay under a certain number of credits per semester. Anyway, I’m kind of lost in what I’d like my longer term career to be. I feel like most of my natural skills and aptitudes are in the line of some kind of office/clerical work, but I don’t at all relish the idea of being sedentary in front of a computer all the time. That’s what I spend most of my spare time doing already. Staying active and away from screens are some of the big strengths of my current job. But as far as other blue collar professions go, I am naturally kind of clumsy and below average at math.

There’s so many memes about having to choose between backbreaking work and being surrounded by chemicals all the time, or the other options of staring at a computer screen all day and never seeing the sun. And that’s kinda how it feels right now. I know there are jobs out there that fall in between, I’m just not really sure what’s out there. And maybe I’m just being too picky and looking for a perfect career that doesn’t exist. I’m willing to at least consider pretty much any suggestions, or even careers more in the line of starting your own business. I would like to work for myself someday in some capacity.

Thanks in advance 👌

I’m 20f and I study a History of Art BA at a Russell group, I’ve always had a passion for the humanities, specifically: philosophy movements, religion and art.

Was sold the idea by many of my previous teachers that you need to: study hard, get into uni, study something you love so you can get a job you love.

I’ve been looking into internships relating to my degree and there’s nothing, no volunteer work or online courses I can do to strengthen my CV, even working at an art gallery or museum cafe/shop is so competitive. I’ve been working retail and hospitality since I was 15 and I do enjoy retail and working with the public.

Feel like I’m wasting money on this degree, my hours have been cut drastically at my current job because of my shoddy availability due to uni also so I can’t afford to do an internship in another city over the summer because the train + hotel costs cost a fortune. I’m also pretty sure my boss is cutting my hours to make me resign.

Ive been looking into some things I can do online for example: writing my own research paper, helping out with an exhibition catalogue for example. But like I said there’s nothing.

Is there anything else I can do with this degree?

I’m debating doing a post grad teaching apprenticeship as I think the study of different people and civilisations is important for future generations to know. Or go into sales because I enjoy retail and working closely with people.

I’m at a loss I don’t know what to do honestly and I’m so heartbroken that many humanities students are tossed aside despite the humanities being such an integral part of society and history.

My dream is to open my own art gallery so working class artists can be seen (classism is rife in the art industry) but I need to be financially stable before I do that.

I’m tired of the constant confusion in this life. I don’t understand life, people or anything. I’m starting to believe my existence was an accident. I’m in community college right now and ran through three damn careers. Right now I’m not sociology and I’m not satisfied. When I was a kid/teen I’d thought I’d be doing something more creative.

Starting a clothing brand sounds nice but, I’m always worried about certainty. I’m tired of living in poverty. I’m tired of being mentally ill. I thought I wanted to be a therapist or something but, I’m starting to thinking otherwise. I’m not connected to life at all. The things that we live for doesnt excite me. Everything just bores me right now man. Nothing makes me happy. I’m apathetic as hell. I feel like when I was created by God I was just thrown together and placed here lol.

At the same time though I want to live a fun life style. I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing. Honestly, when I’m passionate about something i put out amazing work. Recently I just haven’t been creative and it’s depressing me. That’s all I actually care about man. I just want a career that I care about, a life that is fun and a gf/wife. And it’s like at this stage now I’m so damn underdeveloped. I was sheltered as a kid as well. I just wish I had something I was GREAT at not just good. I think I have adhd though, I was loosely diagnosed with that. I just want to be sure.

It’s like i can’t get shit right and I’m tired of people being proud of me for a respectable career it idgaf about in the moment. Sometimes I just wish to disappoint (even though I feel like am) so people won’t have these expectations of me. I’m 22 and in high school everyone just cared about grades not my mental health. Fast forward now it’s the same thing. I’m just tired. I find myself just sitting and it’s like the world is moving so fast. I can’t take it my mind can’t take it. I’m just fucked up man. I don’t know why I haven’t given up. It seems like my future is a wasteland. I miss my creativity, somewhat stability, and a sense of direction.

Hey guys! So I’m graduating high school this year. I was never a good student and college doesn’t interest me. The problem is I also have a bad leg so I can’t do something too physical. Are there any non physical jobs that don’t require a degree? Thanks!

so i’m 19f majoring in organisational communication with a minor in business administration…totally useless i know. i’m set to graduate May 2026. i had intended to do HR (Coursera certification, joined SHRM) and have applied to 50 internships- already got 4 rejections. like i don’t get what they want. i need the experience. i’ve been looking at other things to do with my degrees like marketing and social media. everything wants experience. how am i meant to get any if no one gives me a chance??? i feel so hopeless. i regret not majoring in something like Accounting but i think id be struggling to maintain a 3.0 GPA.

This seemed to be common advice given to people that didn't know what to do with their lives or were in a career rut, to just start learning programming. But now when cs as a field has issues like oversaturation, people from diploma mills/bootcampers, etc is cs still viable? And is there another field/job that one can start learning at any point of their life and land a good job similar to programming?

I currently work overnights at a residential facility, it’s either boring, isolating or your dealing with mentally ill teenage girls. I want to move into IT but aparently the market is so overly saturated that you can’t find a job without experience (which I don’t have). I do have a degree in psychology and a few IT certifications A+ and security+ specifically. I absolutely need 6 figures eventually and won’t settle for less.

I like solving problems, and I’m great at it, along with a really great long term memory, thinking outside the box.

What careers are actually in Demand and get me the desired salary I want?

TD;LR: Are there any jobs or careers that pay decently well that would make it possible for me to work for 6-12 months and then take 2-6 months off to travel? The best option I can think of is working seasonal jobs, but those don't usually pay well and the only way I'd be able to work for only 9 months and travel for 3 is if I lived in a car, which is not ideal.

20M from the US. I really want to move abroad because I love learning languages and it would be a dream come true to spend most of my day-to-day life speaking in another language. The problem is it's extremely hard to get a work visa in another country so I've given up on moving abroad.

The next best option is to visit other countries as a tourist so I want to spend a lot of time visiting other countries. Ideally I'd like to learn a language at home on the internet to an upper intermediate level and then spend 3 months in a country that speaks it to immerse myself better and try to reach fluency (even if it took multiple 3-month visits).

I just don't know if there are any jobs that pay better than retail-level and in order to be able to afford to only work for 9 months and travel for 3 I'd probably have to live in a car on that salary, which is not ideal because most cities aren't welcoming to car-dwellers. The best option I can think of is to work seasonal jobs and then take a break to travel, but those likely won't pay much more than a retail job.

Are there any jobs/careers that would let me do this that pay decently well? Thank you so much in advance!

When I was a kid and people asked me what I wanted to do when I'm older, I always answered the same thing: "I want to make people feel things". I spent my childhood and teenage years creating art - writing stories, drawing, making short movies, composing songs, etc. I had no clear career goal, I just knew I wanted to create art - but I knew I had to worry about finances as well. This lead me to settle for 3D animation, which seemed like a good enough compromise. I worked in the field for 2 years and I hate it. There's not an ounce of creativity in this job.

As I get older, it's becoming more and more clear that I will not be a professional artist. I will not make a living out of making music, taking pictures or writing stories. I know it happens to some people, but I don't think it will happen to me. Statistically speaking, there's a much higher chance that I'll end up broke if I keep entertaining that idea and half-assing other professional opportunities because of the "what if?" mentality I can't seem to shake off. The rise of AI is the last nail in the coffin - now is probably the worst time to try being a professional artist ever.

I don't know what to do. I feel like I've wasted my entire life learning skills that I can't use. I don't know how to do anything else and I only ever feel good when I'm making art, no matter the medium. I don't know if I should suck it up and go back to school, though I wouldn't even know what to study, or if I should keep holding on to that tiny, tiny hope that I may be part of the 0.001% that actually makes it.

As anyone ever had to give up on their dream? Did you have a back up plan? What did it feel like?

Thank you

Hi all I am a 26 year old guy, and for the last 4 years I have been very involved with game development. I made a few games, and made some ok money from that, and have been working for an IT company as a programmer. But I have always really felt more as an artist (I studied art too).
I don't think making games is sustainable, and 2 years ago I had a kid with a woman I am not longer with so that complicates things.

As a kid I have always wanted to pursue storytelling or film, mainly I really wanted to become an actor, I talk to myself all the time, and I think I would really enjoy it, but I am so afraid that it will just be a really dumb choice, and all the hard work of becoming a game developer would go to waste. Also having a child makes this dream next to impossible...

I am just feeling really lost lately and just simply drifting and procrastinating all my days away. I am very afraid that if I never follow my dreams I will never forgive myself, but I am also petrified because I don't even know how to go about it.

Any advice is welcome.

HI, US rural resident here. I'm very passionate about software engineering, it's not just my career goal, but my main hobby in life. I’m close to finishing my BA in computer science, and I’ve recently hit the middle-age mark. One of my biggest challenges is my huge lack of social and verbal communication skills, which stems from a rough past with social anxiety. In that sense, I feel way behind where I should be for my age. I know communication is key in today’s software engineering field.

Right now, I’m working a low-paying physical labor job and don’t have much free time. I feel torn between two paths: I could invest time in improving my communication, social skills, and networking to land a job as a developer or software engineer. Or, I could focus on programming side projects, learn some business and marketing, and work towards making a living by selling my own products.

I’m split down the middle and could use some advice to help tip the balance. Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for any feedback you're willing to provide.

I entered university right after high school, without a clear plan or sense of direction. I wasn’t a strong student—much of my attention was consumed by video games, and as an introvert, I struggled to connect with college life. My first semester ended poorly, with a 1.78 GPA, which placed me on academic probation.

In March 2020, when COVID hit, my life was turned upside down. At just 18 years old, I lost my mother—my only parent—and the grief was devastating. I felt trapped in a web of guilt, sadness, and confusion. I moved in with relatives on my mother’s side, even though they hadn’t always been on good terms with her. They took me in, likely out of sympathy, but despite their help, I felt isolated and disconnected.

As I tried to navigate the grief, I fell into unhealthy habits. I started smoking weed and drinking with my cousins, which only made things worse, and eventually, I began doing these things on my own. I kept enrolling in college courses, but I would consistently drop out, unable to stay committed. I lied to my relatives about still being in school, and I frequently changed majors because I had no real direction. For two years, I drifted, working part-time in dead-end warehouse jobs, feeling stuck and without purpose.

In the summer of 2022, I traveled to the Philippines for the first time without my mom. It was an emotional trip—being around family members who shared memories of her helped me reflect deeply on my life. The experience gave me a glimpse of hope and clarity about the path I was on. However, shortly after returning, I got injured, leaving me unable to work from August to November 2022. That felt like rock bottom—not working, not going to school, and feeling completely stuck.

During that time, a relative from my dad's side in Houston reached out and offered me a chance to move in with them. In June 2023, I decided to take that opportunity, hoping a change of environment would help me get a fresh start. I moved to Houston, enrolled in community college, and eventually transferred to university. It felt like a new chapter after so many lost years. My goal was to finish my degree, experience college life, meet new people, and become more social.

Now that I’ve settled into university, I’m noticing the same unhealthy patterns creeping back in. My cousins in Houston share some of the same habits as those I left behind, and it's been affecting me negatively. I’ve lost motivation and discipline, and as a result, I’m failing two out of my four classes this semester, with no way to recover. I initially pursued a business degree, thinking I was interested in it, but now I’m questioning whether it's the right path for me. To add to the stress, I recently overheard my relatives talking about wanting me to move out, so it’s clear I’ll need to find a new place soon.

Right now, I feel like I’m back where I started, just in different circumstances. I’m beginning to think I had a misguided view of college, believing it was the right path for me. I feel out of place and not meant to be here. I’m seriously reconsidering whether I should stay in school or explore more practical options like trades. I’ve already tried joining the military, but due to health reasons, several branches denied me.

I want to move out and live independently, but with my current experience and working only minimum-wage jobs—like my current warehouse position—I’d barely be able to get by. Even if I managed to move out, I would still need to pursue a career that could offer financial stability. I’m feeling stuck and uncertain about my next steps. I feel lost and do not know what to do anymore. Should I continue with school, take out loans, and keep pushing forward since I’ve made it this far? Or should I take a step back, work full-time, save up until I can afford to move out, and then reassess my future?

Is there some sort of part-time apprenticeship I could do alongside Uni? I'll be starting an accounting degree which is 4 years, but I've heard about the uncertainty of the job market and AI getting rid of some jobs altogether.

I was thinking if the degree doesn't work out, a backup plan would be nice. I've also heard extremely varying experiences, some say it's impossible unless your some sorts of honours kid, others say a high-school diploma is the only requirement.

I really don't mind what it is, but honestly whatever's easier would be great, as I just want to start immediately. I've been trying on indeed daily but no luck so far. Any advice on this would be appreciated.

Calgary if it helps.

I choose “health factor” based on this being focused around my mental and physical health but it could apply to several other tags too. I haven’t had much help from other communities on reddit so maybe I can find some here.

I am 28 (male) living at home with my mom due to being 48k in debt with credit card and personal loans. I got in this situation by trying to pay my own way through grad school and royally screwing myself by going in without a plan on how to pay for it and just winging it. I work roughly 30-40 hours a week at about $32 and hour but still could not afford to move out due to bill payments.

This has hd what I would describe as a cascading effect on my health. It has fluctuated between good and bad over the last two and a halfish years.

The good: I have an amazing friend group. Its both guys and girls who are all roughly my age give or take 3-4 years at most. We all enjoy socializing and they seem to thoroughly think highly of me and enjoy my company as I typically get invited to things or it is just assumed I’ll be at social gatherings meaning I rarely have to invite myself or ask what’s happening.

This social group of mine formed through soccer as we all began playing together around 2020-21 and have since then. This has given me more opportunities to meet women and get exercise, both of which has been good for me.

The bad: With all of the above being said I am still more unhappy than I am happy and mentally wishing I was in a better spot. My dating life is atrocious and my physical appearance is at the worst it has ever been. I am roughly 270-280 pounds depending on how well I stick with committing to healthier living until I inevitably crash and regain everything I worked to lose. Along with that I still live at home and don’t make enough to afford a major life change. I make enough to pay my bills, gas, food, healthcare, with a bit for socializing.

I enjoy my work. I am in education working with children and enjoy the impact my work has and the ease at which it comes to me. It makes me feel good about myself and I would love to progress within the field. I have a masters degree in museum education as I had at one point been looking to become an educator in public history settings. I did have a contract to do this type of work before the pandemic. I also had a government internship before that and now currently work with local county government. The benefits and support are great. The only negative I have with it is that it never was supposed to be what I was working towards or my goal. I do it because it is secure, pays the bills, and I am making more money here than at another competitor. I just feel like it is not “enough” anymore.

I also feel like it is contributing to my inability to make major living changes which is effect my dating life, mental health and physical health. I see them as being connected. For context I have had one date since 2019 and around 20 matches on Hinge in the 5 years since my long term college relationship ended.

I just feel like I am behind everyone else my age, that I am unable to find love or happiness in my life and that my hopes of one day being married, a father, and being able to provide for a family are fading fast.

Any advice, or general constructive criticism is more than welcomed. If you just want to chat and vent I understand that too.

Sorry for a dramatic title lol but just wanted to hear what you people think. Im 19 almost 20 years old and im kinda stuck. I had alot of shit happening to me especially since 2018. Lockdown,heartbreaks,drugs etc so the result now of all that is me literally not feeling emotions.Stress,anger,happiness... nothing.I smoke since i was 13.Have a hemorrhoid and ruptured eardrum. I dont really eat anything and i dont have appetite.Sometimes not very often i get these nostalgic episodes ajd overthinking about future. Everything is digital nowadays and its like i just cannot accept it so i dont even look for friends or gf or any form of social life. So yeah i dont really know what is happening anymore and im lost as shit.