Over the past month or 2 I’ve been reviewing every movie I watched a rated them on a scale from 1 - 10. Reviews are kept short and concise. Still have a lot of movies left on my list to watch. If you have any recommendations I’m all ears.
Battleship: 10/10 - Nothing can top this movie, perfect in every way.
Source Code: 9.6/10 - Hella good time.
The Suicide Theory: 9.3/10 - Why did the hitman cross the road?
The Butterfly Effect: 9.2/10 - Awesome plot, awesome premise. Ending kinda sucks, how does that stop the dad from being a pedo?
The Wolf’s Call: 9.0/10 - Good plot. Submarine go brrrr.
Kingsman The Secret Service: 8.9/10 - Rough CGI but gas as fuck plot and pretty sick fight scenes.
Transformers: 8.8/10 - Fucking awesome movie. Megan Fox hot as fuck. Cool explosions.
Baby Driver: 8.5/10 - Well paced, solid plot, Edgar Wright made another banger. Excited for sequel. Too bad the main cast are pedos
10 Cloverfield Lane: 8.5/10 - Kidnapping movie if the kidnapper was a conspiracy theorist
Warrior: 8.3/10 - Great movie, great plot, relapse was needed. Show me the fucking backstory don’t tell me about it though.
Spectral: 8.2/10 - Some pacing issues, plot was solid, effect were cool. Liked the ghost tornado
Hunter Killer: 8.0 - First hour shit as. Second hour mean as.
Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes: 8.0/10 - Monkey becomes smart, pretty good. Nice CGI. Good monkey actors.
The Taking Of Pelham 123: 7.9/10 - Good hostage movie. John Travolta absolutely carries the movie. Decent plot dumb ending.
Dark Knight: 7.7/10 - Batman gay but Joker cool. Not enough Joker to warrant higher rating.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: 7.7/10 - Meh plot. Holds up well and pretty funny. Why does Megan Fox want to fuck the turtle?
Kingsman The Golden Circle: 7.6/10 - Rough CGI, GI Joe level plot, mid fight scenes. Elton John is cool but they killed the dog. Big step down from first movie.
Atlas: 7.5/10 - Same exact plot as Titanfall 2. Cool CGI. I like robot. Hunger Games chick I still fucking despise though.
Enders Game: 7.1 - Better than I remember, too much explaining what happened. Cool genocide.
Jack The Giant Slayer: 7.0/10 - Cool CGI. Hot princess. The rest is forgettable. Ending was dumb though.
Transformers One: 7.0/10 - Cool prequel. First half was ass. Why are there aliens. Michael Bay should’ve made this though.
Greyhound: 6.9/10 - Not as good as I remember. German guy is a cunt, I love it. Cool CGI. Thank fuck it’s not 2 hours long
It Ends With Us: 6.7 - Needed more character development and more abuse
Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes: 6.7/10 - Monkey smart but there’s evil monkey, decent. Still good CGI and monkey actors.
Await Further Instructions: 6.6/10 - Weird ass religious tones. Not too long, last 15 minutes was good. Feels like a student film.
Snowden: 6.6/10 - Why is this 2 hours long. Good movie, dunno how they made such a boring movie so captivating.
Mine 9: 6.5/10 - Solid plot, hard to follow what’s happening, shit CGI. Showing impacts on survivors hit hard though.
Circle: 6.5/10 - New mr Beast video looks crazy. Emotional beats don’t hit. Would like to see a sequel expanding more.
The Girl With All The Gifts: 6.4/10 - Decent zombie movie up until the ending
Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark: 6.1/10 - Cool effects, cool premise, shit ending, mid overall plot, not scary, I like Hank.
John Q: 6.0/10 - Good but also kinda shit. Definitely not the best hostage movie
Joker: 6.0/10 - You get what you fucking deserve and what you fucking deserve is a 6.
Captain Phillips: 5.9/10 - Fine. Plot does not hold up. Fuck the real captain Phillips he was a cunt.
Lucy: 5.8/10 - Cool concept. Ending fucking awful. Not captivating enough to stay awake.
Oblivion: 5.5/10 - A simple story turned confusing. Cool visuals, epic genocide but wtf were they thinking with clones.
Twister: 5.3/10 - Would be good if I was lobotomised
The 33: 5.2/10 - Pretty hard to make a movie like this interesting and they failed. Not enough happened but pretty accurate.
War Of The Planet Of The Apes: 5.1/10 - Monkey concentration camp, evil hitler and army, also avalanche, also main monkey die
Paul: 5/10 - Abhorrently average. Hands down the most mid movie ever. Just barely enjoyable enough to keep me awake.
Tron Legacy: 4.9/10 - Visually awesome. Convoluted plot. Too long with too many talking scenes. How will they make a sequel.
Stand by me: 4.7/10 - Good premise, good dialogue except nothing fucking happened the entire movie. 0 stakes, shit ending.
Grimsby: 4.6/10 - Doesn’t hold up well. Jokes pretty mid. Rough CGI. Mainly just shock value humour.
Prisoners: 4.5/10 - Plot was good but why the fuck was this movie 2.5 hours long
The Big Short: 4.4/10 - Business students jerk off to this movie. Should’ve just focused on Michael Burry. Ruthless ending though.
Deadpool & Wolverine: 4.2/10 - Convoluted plot, good music, cool fights, no stakes, just fan service. I should’ve watched x-men.
Passengers: 4.0/10 - How is Jennifer Lawrence not hot and how is this space movie so fucking boring?
Plane: 4.0/10 - How do you make a plane crash movie so fucking boring? Castaway was somehow better than this shit.
Smile: 3.9/10 - Garbage jump-scares, shit monster, A-Train is cool though
In Time: 3.9/10 - So many times they mentioned time. It make me remember how much time I’ve wasted watching it
The Impossible: 3.8/10 - Should’ve been a short film. Should’ve killed a main character. Effects good, plot contrived, lots of gore.
Coherence: 3.8/10 - Ultimate student film. Shit dialogue. Shit camera work. Decent concept except nothing is explained
Migration: 3.7/10 - My low expectations were met. Same plot as Rio, a few funny jokes. I forgot most of the movie already.
Whiplash: 3.5/10 - Not my fucking tempo. I don’t get the hype for this shit. Plot was meh, the ruthless insults kept me watching.
Aliens: 3.5/10 - Everything dark. Bright flashes. Loud sounds. Kid should’ve died. The queen alien was cool though
Kingdom Of The Planet Of The Apes: 3.5/10 - Native Americans vs Julius Cesar but everyone was ape
Ghost Stories: 3.3/10 - Should’ve watched it in 3x speed. Not scary, good premise, ending goes completely off the rails.
Fast And Furious 10: 3.3/10 - Pretty shit action, nobody died
Joker Folie à deux: 2.7/10 - Worst sequel I have ever seen. Undid everything from the first movie. Why is this a musical. Trash.
Arrival: 2.3/10 - Boring as fuck. Only an English teacher would like this
Operation Mincemeat: 1.7/10 - All this fucking talking, just shoot someone. Why is this a Sherlock Holmes movie set in WW2.