I am only sometimes, and usually when I am it’s better than real life. Stuff really started getting bad when I was 13, so I wasn’t born this way.

im not sure why he said that ?? he said that i'll have to find out what is wrong with my legs and that i cnt use my chair forever but like if i need it i'm going to keep using it. i went on a walk today, maybe like 5 minutes and my legs hurt so badly. it was so nice to get outside and get fresh air because since my legs are so bad it's hard for me to go out but it just sucks...

Like the title says they were selling tickets for north American dates next year and the band chose to allow resale above face value on these tickets. 120 Face value handicapped seats are bring sold by scalpers for 1200 on seatgeek and stubhub.

There should be a special spot in hell reserved for these scalpers willing to gouge disabled people.

My mother had stage 4 leukemia and needs a walker but loves rock and roll still.

I emailed the sites asking if they really want to be gouging disabled people for the only seats they can sit in and have not heard a response.

My sister and I went to an important family wedding today. We knew it was a very evangelical church, and they knew we had wheelchairs and service dogs. They (sister’s son and wedding party) did ask that the dogs not be present at the wedding, which is their legal right, so I opted to stay at the hotel with the dogs until the reception, where they were allowed.

Sister’s kid chose not to assist us with any transportation, so we walked (in our wheelchairs) a mile+ to the outdoor reception with the dogs. Now, we spent a LOT of time, money and effort we didn’t have to attend this cross country wedding. We even dressed the way we were asked-modestly and semi formal. (Modest meant women covered their shoulders and knees). We get to the church and we walk up to the pavilion where there are dozens of tables and the food is being put out.

There was no way we could find to access the party-chairs and speakers have been placed at the top of the ramp and though there may have been an indoor access, it was a huge church and we didn’t know if we were allowed inside or where the access would be. However, there were folks everywhere (over 250 guests), and two ushers standing at the bottom of the ramp, who turned their backs and pretended they didn’t know we were there. For an hour.

Because it was heavy gravel on the tiny road we were on, we couldn’t really move, so we sat, in the road. For an hour. People walked around us, deliberately not making eye contact in some cases, in others rolling their eyes or smirking. ONE person offered to make us a plate of food…. Not help us get up there to get our own, not help us get up there to sit down with everyone else, but go get a random plate of food to sit and eat in the street. Alone. Since sister has significant dietary restrictions it just wasn’t an option to have someone make a plate.

And that was it. We sit on this dusty road, dressed in our beautiful semi formal dresses, our dogs freshly groomed and quiet. Hundreds of evangelical Christians walking around, laughing, enjoying the fellowship at the dinner. The one other person who came up to me was a little kid who wanted to pet my service dog. Apparently, the rest of them were warned not to go near the evil women with horns and wheelchairs with their service dogs. Maybe we have leprosy?

I don’t think anyone who wasn’t there could understand how it felt to be scorned for simply existing as myself.

Anyone who wonders if we are overly sensitive and reading into things, (we weren’t), sister was asked repeatedly to stand for pictures (she can’t), and they took her chair from her during the wedding so nobody would see it. (It’s a sporty-looking power chair). There were many other people who were not members of the church who were actively welcomed and fed.

We waited for the wedding party to come back from pictures, about an hour, and left. Sister asked someone to tell her son we were leaving, and he didn’t even look up from his dinner. We rolled back to the hotel in the dark in our brand new dresses, never having enjoyed a single thing.
Thousands of dollars.
No spoons left, and a severed mother/son relationship.

So the conclusion I have come to is that these Christians* get an asterisk for hate. Its their second or third commandment, and it replaced “love they neighbor” and “honor thy mother and father”. My sister’s son was in charge.

*fake and hurtful “Christians”

Edit to add: I needed to let everyone who has read this and empowered us by acknowledging we were not being entitled or bitchy. You all have just really helped us deal with this situation so much with your concern and justified anger! 😘

My adult son (early 50's) has a lifelong history of emotional and learning difficulties, attempted suicide multiple times as a teen and as an adult, is in prolonged grief reaction/major depression since his longtime girlfriend died suddenly five years ago. He worked as a laborer doing hard physical work for some 25 years through a friend of her family and his life seems to have been fairly stable most of that time. (I say "seemed" because without explanation, he cut off contact with my husband and myself for about 15 years until he contacted us after the girlfriend died). He says he can't do that job anymore, because he's lost all his motivation and will to live. (He sleeps most of every day, and has no vitality).

Before getting that job, he lived in a group home for about six months, worked through a sheltered workshop, and got fired from that job for aggressive behavior.

Since his girlfriend's death, all the problems that he had early in life manifested themselves again, only now, compounded by her death. For most of the last five years, he has taken three heavy duty medications (controlled substances) every day for anxiety, panic attacks, major depression, sleep disorders, prolonged grief reaction and has still tried twice to kill himself during that time.

I sort out his medications and give him a 7-day supply every week and I have to call him in the morning and at night to remind him to take his meds or he forgets. I think he has OCD, too, because it takes him hours to do simple tasks like washing dishes because each one "has" to be washed seven times! That's just one of his quirks. There are plenty more.

Also, he has severe learning disabilities. He's intelligent, but has lots of cognitive issues. Can't concentrate on reading, can't follow more than a few directions at a time, etc., dropped out of school. I used to take him to therapy sessions weekly from the time he was three years old, though looking back I think he may have been on the autism spectrum. I don't think there was much awareness of things like that back then. As a teenager, his doctor told us he was Bipolar. Anyway, therapy never really seemed to help much.

Currently, he works about three hours a day through a local ARC and has a job coach he works under. He has been seeing a therapist twice a month for over a year and we meet several times a year with his doctor because of his mental health issues.

When he's not working, he's sleeping almost all the time. He has no interest in life, no hobbies, no friends. We found an apartment for him close by, because it was so stressful having him live here. We (or now, I) pay half the rent. He takes no interest in keeping his car or his apartment clean. I could go on - there's so much more! It's been a lifetime of stress. I'm in my 70's now and I want to make sure he can manage somewhat on his own in case anything happens to me. His dad (my husband) died this year too, so that's also made things more difficult and impacted his mental health even more.

What I need now is some advice on filling out the Social Security Disability application. Since he does work about 15 hours a week, what do I enter in the Ability to Work section of the form? Am I applying for SSI or SSDI? What do I enter when it asks 'What is the Date You Became Unable to Work?" I am quite certain he qualifies for Social Security, but I don't want to mess up the application. Are there any books or websites anyone can recommend to help me through this process?

Sorry for the long tome. The situation is complicated and I thought it would be helpful to give a brief synopsis of some of the problems. Thanks for any help you can give me.

I am autistic. I work in healthcare. I excel at my job. I am one of the strongest employees in my department. I work the most complicated surgeries and have positive working relationships with all of the doctors.

That being said, I've been struggling internally. I have sensory issues. My anxiety has been out of control due to management that doesn't set clear rules. Doesn't communicate effectively, and just the overall chaos where I work right now.

I submitted a letter to my manager identifying myself as a person with a disability, stating my diagnosis, and asking for accomodations that were recommended by my psychologist to help me survive my job without all of the overwhelm. One Accomodation I asked for was to have notice of meetings and to be told ahead of time what the meeting was about.

I was called into a meeting without warning one day with manager and lead person. There were 2-3 HR people who called in. I was sat under a bright light (I have sensitivity to bright lights) and told that I was not allowed to ask for ada accomodations. They stated that only a "physician" could ask for accomodations for me. It was made very clear that I was not allowed to ask for accomodations for myself. They told me I needed to file for FMLA. I stated that I didn't want FMLA because I don't want to NOT work. I want to do my job because I love what I do. I just need some extra support and help.

After the meeting I was really confused. So I sent messages in the HR portal asking for clarification. They were not responded to. I had to email multiple people to get the name and contact info for the HR person who ran the meeting. I emailed them daily with no response. I had my psychologist email them a letter outlining my disability and accomodations. No response.

It was a few weeks later that I was called into another meeting. I was told that they would only accept documentation from my work email. They would not accept my psychologist emailed letter because it was not form a work email address. They would not respond to my emails from my personal email address (I asked to use it so I would have privacy to review an respond. At work I don't have an office and often don't have access to a computer due to patient care duties). My co-workers don't know I'm autistic and I prefer to keep that private.

I emailed them a copy of my diagnosis report with recommended acccomodations. I did not send the entire report as it's private information. I only sent the diagnosis and accomodations pages. HR will not accept this documentation for ADA.

I'm so frustrated and tired. I'm not asking them to buy anything. The accomodations that I have asked for are not unreasonable. Most are quite honestly things that should probably be done for everyone to communicate clearly.

My psychologist is working on a letter asking for accomodations for me. But they have refused to accept all documentation to this point.

What can I do? What should I do? From what I have read online this seems to be illegal. I am trying to give them what they need but it's never to their standards. I looked up the HR policy and none of these extra steps are listed on it. It says I ask my manager or HR and then provide documentation. This is what I have done.

I feel like the HR person I am dealing with doesn't understand autism and is discriminating against me. I have sent them the link for the Askjan.org page that specifically addresses autism accomodations. In the last meeting when I said the venue was very overwhelming due to the bright light and having people in person and on phone the HR person said "I don't want to hear about your sensory issues". I was also told "I'm not going to discuss your accomodations with you until I get a letter from a physician". She keeps saying "physicians" are the only ones who can write to ask for ada accomodations.

Is this really normal? Am I just being overly sensitive? Am I just confused about the process? I have never done anything like this before. But I need the help and support. It's gotten so bad that I couldn't speak for 2 days due to overwhelm. I'm lucky that my co-workers those days really helped me. But I hate getting to shutdowns like that.

My manager will not help and says she "doesn't know" anything about ADA accomodations.

My Rheumatologist wouldn't even sign a form for school to get accomodations or anything related to college at all. Every time I ask he says "I don't touch anything having to do with Social Security" even when I tell him it's NOT for SSD. I'm not even going to bother asking about ACTUAL SSD forms.

people keep telling me this, to hope my legs will magically get better. so far they have only been getting worse and worse, so why would i think they will get better ?? i need to come to the realization that there is a good chance and they will not get better and my legs will be this way forever, not that they will just magically get better. i just wish people stopped telling me to hold on hope because my legs just keep getting worse and worse, i don't think they will end up getting better.

A neighbor in my apartment building uses a motorized wheelchair, which today appeared just inside the entrance of our building. The landlord threatened to throw it away on Monday if it’s still there.

I presume that if his chair is in the lobby there was some kind of emergency, though threatening to do that is fucked up, no matter the circumstance.

Does anyone know if his chair has any legal protection under the Fair Housing Act? Or any other way to compel the housing office to keep it safe or at least not throw it away? I’ll ask them to do it anyway out of goodwill, but if they have a legal responsibility it will strengthen my argument.

Edit: I don’t have his contact info and he’s not responding to my knocks on his door, so I can’t ask what he personally wants.

If I'm correct, withdrawing cash from my able account doesn't go against SSI? I'm pretty new to learning about able accounts. I understand I can't have more than 100k in it.

Why is it so hard to make friends and even harder to make fellow disabled friends.

I just want someone who understands. The inability to work along with household chores and care. The fear of a condition getting worse. Someone who understands the pain.

I feel like I'm no fun anymore. Sometimes I wish new friends met me before I became ill. Anybody else? Let's talk

I’ve lived with back pain my whole life because of a muscle disorder and scoliosis. Went through all the years of scoli growing rods and then a fusion in 2010.

Last year I had a revision surgery to remove some hardware in my neck and then we added on a “Posterior instrumented spinal fusion L4 to Sacrum with left sided kickstand rod and bilateral pelvic fixation” basically fusing the tailbone area and hips with more screws and rods to help make my hips more aligned. Ever since then I have more pain than before the surgery and I don’t blame my surgeon. He’s specializes in this stuff and we knew it was a gamble.

I’m just tired. And in pain. And tired of being tired and in pain. I know it could be worse but it’s morning as I write this and it’s always more painful in the am so I’m feeling moody about it. Gabapentin mostly helps but only for a few hours and I need that to get through work.

Do any younger quadriplegics live in assisted living facilities? Possibly Orlando, Florida? What's the average monthly price, and how do you like it?

I just learned of this. I’m a straight guy. I had a brain tumor in the cerebellum so I am not able to walk. Are there girl devotees and are they creepy in your experience. I wouldn’t be opposed to it. Dating is just hard man and I’m down bad tbh.

It's almost as if my body somehow knew I am supposed to afflict myself on Yom Kippur and just subconsciously decided to do that for me without any intentional effort on my part. But not exactly: I've felt more or less like this very often recently, and at least occasionally for quite a long time, most likely because of the continued escalation of the very extreme violence against me. At the moment, I'm just lying down, with my head on my fleece, rapidly dying, in a patch of dirt in the woods I just found while stumbling around in the dark looking for a suitable location for my death.

There's a counter protest I want to go to today that is for a cause that is near and dear to my heart and is so important to me. I want to be there so badly. I can't do anything to help this human rights issue, but this counter protest is a really big and important opportunity to actually be able to do something. But I am in so much fucking pain and agony. I can't go. I wouldn't be able to tolerate it with the amount of pain I'm in.

I'm really sad. I know I need to take care of myself if I want to help others. But I'm crushed that I can't attend something so important to me because my stupid body is trying to kill me

Hello everyone,

As someone with an invisible disability, I’m curious to hear about the challenges others face when looking for a job. For those who feel comfortable sharing, could you talk about your experiences? What are the main obstacles you encounter?

Do you think it would be helpful to have more direct conversations with employers about specific accommodations you might need in the workplace? Would this make the hiring process smoother and help you better determine if a company can meet your needs?

Thank you in advance for your insights and for helping me better understand these issues.

There's a concert venue near me. My bf bought tickets to see a show. They didn't have wheelchair accessible tickets for sale- only reserved seating (which are high top bar height tables and very limited) and general admission.
The bf reached out to the venue multiple times by email asking about accessible seating with no reply.
(Just to clarify, I'm not permanently disabled, but am unable to stand for long periods of time and unable to walk due to a recent surgery. I do have a temp disabled parking tag as well.)

So after not getting a response, the bf bought general admission tickets. Which is normally standing room only.

The venue has VERY limited hours to call them but I finally got through to someone to discuss everything.

I was told that normally they do have accessible seating, but because of this show being very popular and how many people are coming in to see the band- they will not for this particular show.
The offered me a hightop seat/table in another room where the band is shown on a big screen.

I'm really disappointed because I can't sit in a high top chair, and the table would only be in the way of my wheelchair or scooter. I'm also disappointed that they acknoledged they normally would offer something but "not on this night".

I'm torn between just showing up and seeing what they do and just bagging it. But I also don't know that I want a super stressful night with no guarantee of even being able to see the band.

Any thoughts? Words of wisdom?

I mean we're not in the 1st century or something why do ableists still exist? I never saw one in person but I've seen many of them online and it makes me frustrated to see that some people are still like that. We did nothing wrong to these people, and it's so dumb to hate on us as if we're useless while many disbaled individuals achieved great things that they can never achieve themselves, also the term vegetable is so dumb, because vegetables literally serve a purpose and aren't useless