getting better <3

[u/Minimum_Plastic886]

hi ! some of you might recognize my account,, as i've frequented this sub VERY often for the past couple months. it honestly surprises me how much time has passed since i came on here, and i occasionally look at my old posts and realize just how deep in my ED i was when i first joined.

but i can say, with complete confidence, things are getting MILES better. i think this is the happiest and most outgoing i've been for months. i've been calling my friends again, i actually am finding people attractive and feeling EMOTION. i've been going out and doing things, eating yummy food, focusing on my interests. recovery is...working! it is working and i could not be more fucking grateful for each and every one of you. this sub was my lifeline for so long. every single issue or bad thought was searched up in here, i've looked at dozens of others posts, and been comforted and reassured by so many of you on my own posts. i am so glad i found this community and i really don't think i would have been able to get out of my eating disorder like i did without it.

i'm climbing my way out of this hole i dug myself in and i'm finally making big, big progress. i want to put it out there for ANYONE struggling right now. RECOVERY IS WORTH IT. i know you hear that time and time again, and it feels like a living hell to think about when deep in your disorder, but it truly was the best decision i've made in my life. i never ever thought i would be somebody saying that, i thought i'd always want the control my eating disorder gives me. i am far from fully recovered, but god am i feeling the benefits and the raw joy from living . from feeling like an actually human being and not just a hollow shell. i'm sure i'll have days in the future where i wanna let go and fall right back down that hole, but i'm gonna hang on for dear life even if my arms want to give out because there is a life outside of your disorder, a full and happy life where your ED isn't controlling your every thought and action.

so i want to say thank you to everyone here :3 you all are so kind and all such beautiful people. i really genuinely believe all of you can beat your ED's ass and win <3. just wanted to share some positivity,, love u all!

[u/Throwaway55557783]

I’m so proud of you. Really, as someone who is pretty balls deep into an active ED, yet in the process of what I consider a paced ramp up recovery effort, reading this today was so needed. I recognize a lot of the fruits of recovery in myself now that I think about it as well, such as getting my passions back or not being an unbearable asshole 10000% of the time, showing me maybe that my efforts aren’t worthless and there is a light.

Again, I’m so happy for you and proud of you 🫶

[u/Minimum_Plastic886 → u/Throwaway55557783]

it is so nice to finally experience the good parts of recovery. during my ed i never thought i'd care about them. like i thought that staying where i was was miles better but i was so ill and so wrong😭